Category: Virtues

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through the experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved.” Helen Keller

We all use strength when we carry on in spite of our difficulties. Some difficulties are hard to overcome, others actually just need determination and perseverance to get to where one wants to be. I find that many of the virtues work together in our daily lives and it can be difficult to distinguish which one is the most important in any situation.

Let me give a personal example. Several years ago I decided that I wanted to go down in weight, not a lot, but perhaps three kilograms would be better for my health. To help me persevere with my decision, I decided to weigh myself every morning, before breakfast, and write it down. Keeping a daily record helps with perseverance with this particular goal.

Along the way, I found that I was unable to actually go down much in weight and keep it off, so I changed my goal. After all, when I thought about the situation, what was most critical was to not go up in weight. Changing my goal gave me the strength to continue with my project. If I ever get back up to my highest weight, I then have the strength and determination to restrict what I eat that day.

This week I want to practice strength, patience, perseverance and determination to reduce my weight in the next month by half a kilogram. These four virtues work hand in hand and cannot be separated in this project. I need the patience with myself if things don’t go right. I need determination to have a goal and work towards it over several weeks. I need strength to resist temptation and to plan meals and activities that will help me attain my goal. I need perseverance to keep going even if things aren’t going as easily as I had hoped.

“Strength is the inner power to withstand whatever comes. It is our capacity to endure in the midst of tests. We grow in strength as we tackle life’s challenges with courage and determination. We deepen in strength when we choose gentleness and practice patience. We stay strong when we recognize that suffering is a thread woven through the design of our lives, not to make us unhappy, but to transform us with grace.”

To practice Strength, I

• have the power to endure my tests
• willingly face the challenges of my life
• have the courage to persevere
• cultivate gentleness and patience
• understand the purpose of suffering
• trust the value of transformation.

We live in a society where everyone seems in a hurry, on the roads, in the stores, or to get things done. For me, practicing patience means that I take the time to do things correctly and well. I plan and set goals, and I work consistently towards my goals. I do a little bit each day. I don’t let others hurry me. I work at my own pace.

It is important to have patience with oneself as well as with others. Trust and faith in ourselves is an important part of patience. On the other hand, patience is not procrastination or letting oneself be bossed around by others. Patience is keeping going, even if the going gets tough.

After a busy social week, I now have a week that can be used to get projects around the house done. I need to spread the projects over several days, getting a balance between different types of projects, especially the difference between sitting activities and activities that mean that I can move around a lot.

Patience is quiet hope and faith that things will turn out right. We trust the process of life. We are not hasty. We do not rush or allow ourselves to be overcome by pressure. Patience helps us to endure things we cannot control with a peaceful heart. We respond to mistakes or delays, not with judgement but gentleness. We recognize the lessons that come through waiting, and receive them as gifts unfolding with Divine timing. Patience brings acceptance. It calls us to be still in the moment, to be restful, and to listen deeply. Patience soothes our souls.

The practice of Patience:
* I am hopeful and expectant.
* I am gentle with myself and others when we make mistakes.
* I accept things I cannot control with humor and grace.
* I am confident that my life is unfolding as it should.
* I live fully in the present moment.

Back in the 1990s we learned about the Virtues Project and every Sunday we pick a virtue to practice for the upcoming week. This week we picked Moderation.

What does Moderation mean for me at this point in my life? We have just finished a holiday season, with too much eating and too little exercise. I am choosing to practice moderation this week by being moderate in my consumption of food and drink. Meal portions need to be the right size so that I have the energy I need to work, but not so large that I put on weight. Caffeine is an addiction and I want to restrict the amount of caffeine drinks that I consume each day. Water is a healthier drink when I’m thirsty. I set myself a goal and I stick to it.

I also need to make sure that I get a moderate amount of exercise, whether it is going for walks outside, or just making sure I get up off the sofa and do some housework.

Moderation means not overdoing things whatever one chooses to spend time on. The day should have a mixture of activities, that include time alone, but also time with others. There should be a mixture of work activities and play activities. There should be time for relaxation as well as serious activities.

“Moderation is the silken thread running through the pearl chain of all virtues.” Joseph Hall

Moderation is being content with enough. It is using self-discipline to create a healthy balance between work, rest, reflection and play. Moderation protects us from the pull of addictive desires. We do not grasp to do or have more in the belief that we are lacking. We do not try to be everything to everyone. We set healthy boundaries that value our time and energy. We protect ourselves from the stress of overdoing. We discern our own perfect rhythm. Moderation isn’t deprivation. It is loving ourselves enough to choose what is just right.

The Practice of Moderation means that:

• I spend my time and energy sustainable.
• I remember to pray and to play.
• I am free of addictions.
• I carry responsibility wisely.
• I protect myself from the stress of excess.
• I live gently and gracefully.